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Joke of the Day

"Long John Silver's is the perfect representation of corporate greed. Nearly everything that company does is selfish."

"A valentine? IN THIS ECONOMY?!?"

"Jesus wouldn't have been good at Twitter He would've only had twelve followers."

"If Jessica Simpson doesn't name one of her kids ""Homer"", then seriously what's the point?"

"I wrote a song about tortillas. Actually it was more of a wrap."

"If I were Mario I'd hang out with Toad all the time He seems like a real fun guy."

"What did the Ocean say to the Beach? Nothing, it just waved... Prolly my favorite joke of all time, maybe ever."

"What's the lightest thing in the world? The penis, Because we can lift it with a thought."

"I'm getting a little tired of these people coming to my door telling me I need to be ""saved"" or ""I'll burn""... Stupid firefighters."

"I'm sick of hearing about this World Class chef at Taco Bell. Chefs don't work at Taco Bell. Your weed dealer works at Taco Bell."