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Joke of the Day

"Wife: Did you pay the mortgage yet? Me: Do you think surfers in India are called Hindudes? Wife: What? Me: What? Communication is hard"

"Bae: Are you coming over? Me: Yes, I'm coming over. - Me and Bae having CB Radio sex"

"""I Wish I Had Her Skin!"" - Teenage Girls & Serial Killers"

"My sense of humor is so dark that my grandmother would have been very unhappy if my sister went on a date with it."

"I had a terrible experience at the Reddit bistro All of the servers were busy"

"How do you stop an Italian from talking? Tie his hands together"

"Accounting Joke: Why did the accountant cross the road? Because that's what they did last year."

"[first day as a doctor] You seem depressed. Also you look underweight, how's your diet? [nurse interrupts me] ""Dr that's the model skeleton"""

"How do you get Dick from Richard? I don't know, ask his wife."

"A grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender says, ""Hey, we have a drink named after you!"" The grasshopper looks surprised and asks, ""You have a drink named Steve?"""