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Joke of the Day

"A grasshopper walks into a bar, and the bartender says, ""Hey, we have a drink named after you!"" The grasshopper looks surprised and asks, ""You have a drink named Steve?"""

"If Hillary Clinton is elected as our first female President it's really going to redefine a few things for me.... ....Like the words President Bush."

"You know what they say about wizards with big hands? The have big staffs"

"/r/jokes in a nutshell... Why did the police officer arrest the pop machine? It was selling coke."

"Obligatory Light Bulb Do you know how many librarians it takes to screw in a light bulb? No, but I know where you can look it up!"

"What should we call it when a man is beautiful? ""Footseveral?"" No but I feel like you're on the right track"

"I heard Reddit likes puns so I posted ten of them thinking at least one would reach the first page no pun in ten did"

"What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bail."

"""How can I help you? Hi I'd like a root canal ""Are you a patient here?"" No ""Who referred you to us?"" No one ""Ok then why-"" I have a Groupon"

"If humans have politics, then what do bees have? POLLENtics"