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Joke of the Day
"How do you stop an Italian from talking? Tie his hands together"
Next Joke
"911: What is your emergency? Me: I love you. 911: Hang up. Me: No you hang up. 911: Stop. Me: This is so us."
"[running from a knife wielding murderer] oh hell yeah, my Fitbit steps are gonna be OFF THE SCALE today"
"In 1979, a call coming from inside the house was a reason for terror. In 2014, it means one of you is too lazy to shout or come downstairs."
"How do you catch an elephant? You dig a big hole, fill it with ash, and put peas around the outside of the hole. When the elephant comes up to take a pea, you kick him in the ash hole."
"A man walks into a doctors wearing cling film trousers Doctor says, "" I can clearly see you're nuts"""
"A man walks into a bar That doesn't make cent"
"All good students of Astrology drop out midway after they learn enough to find out. :)"
"Only at Mcdonalds do they say, ""Sorry about your wait"" and really mean ""weight."""
"Hooker What did the guy say to the hooker after he was finished? Well I'm going to leave it with you!"