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Joke of the Day

"The best thing about hand sanitizer in hospitals isn't the hygiene. It's everyone walking around like they're hatching an evil plan."

"Replaced my shoelaces with ear buds and now they tie themselves."

"What's the difference between Gordon Ramsey and a run in the forest? Ones a pant in the country the others a..."

"2016: Trump elected 2018: Border wall completed 2020: Mexico takes Gold, Silver & Bronze in Pole Vault at the Summer Olympics"

"What do you say to a woman with only one tooth? Nice tooth."

"What did one giant squid say to the other giant squid? What's Kraken!"

"How does a Greek find a sheep in tall grass? Very satisfying!"

"These Alt-Right people should Ctrl+Alt-Right+Delete themselves from American society, Am I right?!"

"What's the difference between me and my couch My couch pulls out"

"What do you call a monkey in a suit? Over-dressed!"