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Joke of the Day
"I want ""Wake me if anything cool happens"" on my tombstone."
Next Joke
"What is 6"" long and not getting sucked this Valentine's day? Whitney Houston's crack pipe"
"I was so depressed dat my ATM displayed someone else's balance to cheer me up"
"There was a man who said... ... ""I never knew what happiness was until I got married...and then it was too late."""
"I went to the barbers today. My wife sent me a text that said we had a pipe leaking. I told the barber we're going to have to cut this short. I walked out with a buzz cut."
"I never wear red because I don't want to anger any bulls disguised as cab drivers or businessmen."
"Why are hurricanes named with female names? Because when they come, they are wet and wild and when they leave they take your house and car with them."
"Sometimes I like to lie on the kitchen floor and pretend I'm a crumb."
"I know it's time to wax my upper lip when the cashier at Firehouse Subs gives me the policeman's discount."
"I hate racist jokes. I don't like people laughing at my beliefs."