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Joke of the Day

"If we went camping... If we went camping and you woke up with a condom in your ass, would you tell anyone? Want to go camping?"

"This isn't a beer belly, it's a fuel tank for a love machine."

"What is Captain Hook's favorite kind of humor? Dead Pan."

"Step on a crack, break your momma's back! So then I went on a walk with my family. I stepped on a crack, looked at my mom, and said ""Why didn't your back break, mom?"" ""You're adopted."""

"Did you guys hear that you can survive just on plants? That is something i never herbivore!"

"Dear Customer Service: First of all, you should know that Im typing this with my middle finger."

"Why did the baby squirrel wear a diaper? To hide his nuts!!"

"Just realized some twitter handles are probably prison ID numbers."

"I think one of the toughest parts about growing up is realizing that you don't sweat blue if you drink blue Gatorade."

"My new Muslim Girlfriend keeps talking about a blow-job. I don't know whether to get my cock out or to warn London transport.........."