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Joke of the Day
"Just realized some twitter handles are probably prison ID numbers."
Next Joke
"An English Girl.. WIFE: ""I'm going to LONDON. What gift do you want?"" HUSBAND: ""An English girl."" After a month, wife returns.. HUSBAND: ""Where is my gift?"" WIFE: ""Wait for nine months!"""
"It doesn't matter that I'm bad at spelling, I'm the best physicist just give me a sodastream and watch."
"If I were any more hungry right now, Brad and Angelina would adopt me :("
"Netflix just asked me to rate 'Spy Kids 2' and I clicked ""I haven't seen it"" but I have. I have seen it. A lot."
"What has 200 legs 50 noses and is very loud? A herd of stampeding aardvarks!"
"What do you call a rooster with erectile dysfunction? Boneless chicken."
"What is harder than telling the difference between Chinese people? Telling the difference between Chinese people with down syndrome."
"The Jewish Dilemma... Free Pork"
"(1st day in heaven) Angel: STOP ASKING EVERYBODY WHAT THEY DIED OF"