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Joke of the Day
"If you're not supposed to drink shampoo why do they make it in such pretty colors?"
Next Joke
"What do you call a bored motherfucker? Grandpa"
"Feed me once shame on you, Feed me twice i'm moving in."
"Don't hate every single one of your friends yet? Get Facebook."
"""Who are you wearing?"" -red carpet interviewer at the Serial Killer Awards"
"I don't think my new air conditioner likes me very much It keeps giving me the cold shoulder"
"The first thing I'm doing with my time machine is telling my past self to only microwave popcorn for 2 minutes max."
"nicole kidman please name your next child Teendude"
"Me: Do you like the new ceiling fan? Her: Yeah, but the fan light is really dull. Fan light: Ok wow like I'm right here"
"What's the difference between Santa and a jew? Santa goes down the chimney."