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Joke of the Day

"Aww, you ""only wish the best for your exes?"" That's cool, I lie about things too."

"Do you know why WWII got the world out of The Great Depression? Because we got all the money back from the Jews."

"What's the difference between an onion and a woman? I cry when I cut open an onion"

"Thanks iPhone autocorrect, I'm sure my dad wanted to know that I miss going on our weekend fisting trips."

"This is where I draw the line! ________________________________________________________"

"What do you call a lamington that weighs a lot? A lamingTON!"

"Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop. I'll go ahead and show myself out now"

"Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke? Joke Joke Jooooooooke."

"Doctor: ""Your wife is in hospital!""... Me: ""...How is she?"" Doctor: ""I'm afraid she's critical"". Me: ""Oh, you get used to that...""."

"What's a hipsters favorite season? Summer, they like it before it's cool"