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Joke of the Day
"Dance like no one is watching! Comment like you don't live in your mom's basement!"
Next Joke
"What do you call a self-absorbed trumpet player? Brasshole"
"ME: my son ran away COP: we won't rest until we find him ME: [swiping LEGO aside with both feet] no rush"
"everytime pitbull performs i get scared because i probably know the words from drunken bar nights"
"speak, three languages you are trilingual, two, bi-lingual, what do they call you if you only speak one language? American"
"My tall sister took the vodka out of the cupboards above the fridge. I always thought those doors were just there for decoration."
"What is the biggest difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops at three Ho's"
"Jared Fogle was guilty and got 16 years He was just grateful for anything under 18. Credit to SNL that joke might have converted me to watch."
"Did ya hear about the Mexican who kept washing his dog? They were spic and spaniel"
"RaidTM: For when you don't want to kill ants, but want to make them late for something."