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Joke of the Day

"My mum told me to stop tickling my little brothers feet. Apparently I should wait until he is born."

"How does Harry Potter travel about? Walking -Jk Rolling"

"Teachers in school told me I wouldn't amount to anything, now i'm laughing all the way to the bank... To dispute my most recent overdraft fee"

"Two wind turbines in a field and one says to the other ""Do you like music?"" He replies ""I'm a big metal fan."""

"I don't understand how anyone could be a grave robber. How do you steal a six foot hole?"

"Nothing makes you look like an alcoholic more than not knowing how you got a cut on your face."

"[praying in church] Please God let church end early"

"Why do jews get their penises circumcised? Because Jewish girls won't touch anything that's not 10% off"

"NSFW:Guy's should hold on to their memories. Guy's should hold on to their memories. Stupid Auto Correct: I meant mammaries."

"MIDDLE EAST: How can we stop ISIS? EUROPE: How can we save our economy? AMERICA: What color is this dress?!"