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Joke of the Day

"Hooker to customer: ""I will do anything for you for $500"". Customer says incredulously: ""ANYTHING?"" Hooker: ""Sure"" Customer: ""Meet me at my house on Friday, I want you to -"" ""paint my house."""

"Makes a girlfriend in IIT. Breaks up with her. Adds Ex IITian in bio."

"What did the mathematician and the dentist talk about? Calculus"

"My angry wife left me after she said "".. eat shit and die! "" And all I said was: ""So dinner is ready?""."

"New Years Resolutions I've decided on a few attainable resolutions... * put on some weight * exercise less * watch some TV, play some computer games * procrastinate (maybe I'll do that later)"

"How do you enter an Egyptian's tomb? Tut-an-kham-en"

"My friend told me everytime he goes to this sub he finds new hilarious jokes I was surprised at first, but then I remembered he has a short-term memory."

"What's the different between England and a tea bag? A tea bag last longer in the cup"

"Man didn't invent the wheel It invented itself after seeing Chuck Norris."

"I once dated a midget... I was nuts over her"