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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Donald Trump and Adolf Hitler? A mustache"

"What do you call a bunch of Mexican stoners? Baked beans"

"When I was 13 my dad gave me a bunch of socks n said ""I heard u grunting in ur room last night, do it into these"" So now I poop into socks"

"Sad how some stick figures get stuck working the hangman game, while others get to have nice families on the back of SUVs"

"Why don't you see blonde pharmacists? They can't get the bottles into the typewriter!"

"Women are like campfires. Beautiful, hot, smell great, warm your heart. And, both don't like it if you pee on them. Mostly."

"Four years ago I asked a girl out on a date and today I asked her to marry me. She said no both times."

"There was a fight in the Fish and Chip shop the other day The fish got *battered* and the chip got *a-salted*."

"Two years ago, my favourite cow died Today, I finally moooved on."

"""so what did you do before self-driving cars?"" ""we just drove 'em ourselves!"" ""wow, no one died that way?"" ""oh no, millions of people died"""