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Joke of the Day

"I went to the doctors with hearing problems He said ""Can you describe the symptoms?"" I said ""Homers a fat bloke and Marge has blue hair"""

"Pouring one out for your homie is extra sad because first your friend died and now there's a mess."

"Him: Get on my level. Me: You're a gamer? Him: .... Me: .... Him: You need to get out more. Me: *mumbles* Your face needs to get out more."

"I went to buy a book about Bernie Sanders ...but it was sold out."

"Whatever happened to silk underwear? A: Fell through the cracks."

"""Still upset about earlier?"" Yeah ""So you knocked over a few spaghetti boxes at the store. No big deal"" I WAS A WORLD JENGA CHAMPION, SALLY"

"Yo mama so fat She couldn't fit in this joke."

"What did the black guys say to the bleach? you basic"

"WHEN CATS ARE SAD Bartender: What'll ya have? Cat: Shot of rum. [Bartender pours it] [Cat slowly pushes it off the bar] Cat: Another."

"PESSIMIST: Dark tunnel. OPTIMIST: Light at the end of the tunnel. REALIST: A train. TRAIN OPERATOR: 3 idiots standing on the tracks."