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Joke of the Day

"""Still upset about earlier?"" Yeah ""So you knocked over a few spaghetti boxes at the store. No big deal"" I WAS A WORLD JENGA CHAMPION, SALLY"

"Why did the melon try so hard to get her father's approval? Because she cant-aloupe"

"My stepladder is so great, I'm almost glad my ladders got divorced."

"That Hamburger Helper hand guy. There's a twin out there, right? Didn't go into showbiz. Maybe an accountant or something."

"What do you call 5 people sitting In two rows? Tetris"

"2 Muffins are sitting in an oven... One says to the other ""man its hot in here"" the other one yells terrified ""OH MY GOD A TALKING MUFFIN!!"""

"In the toy shop in my area, packet balloons cost $0.10 each, but $10 when filled with air? God damn inflation."

"A man recently felt funny and came over queasy... At which point he was asked to leave the local amateur production of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves."

"My grandpa died in Auschwitz He fell down from the watchtower."

"Why did the Ferguson protesters not participate in Black Friday? Because they have already looted everything they would have bought anyway."