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Joke of the Day

"I lost my girlfriend recently. Then the topic moved away from science and she was fine again."

"How Jesus was named: Mary: Joseph, I'm having a baby. Joseph: JESUS CHRIST!"

"So many Jehovah's Witnesses and yet still not a shred of Jehovah's Evidence."

"How do you titillate an ocelot? You oscillate its tit a lot"

"How many apples grow on a tree? ALL OF THEM!!"

"I was drinking at the bar, so I took a bus home. That may not be a big deal to you, but I've never driven a bus before!"

"What celebrity never payed with a cheque or credit? Johnny Cash."

"[God creating beards] ADAM: God, I don't like my face. GOD: Tell ya what, buddy: I'll cover it in pubes. ADAM: What? That's not GOD: Done."

"As a German, you know what really grinds my gears? Nothing. My engineering is perfect."

"The real reason Hillary Clinton stumbled A tiny plane flew into her."