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Joke of the Day
"Why can't an egg ever be in charge? Because they crack under pressure."
Next Joke
"This girl just spilt ice all over my record player. I played it cool."
"Blockbuster Joke George Lucas, Peter Jackson and James Cameron walk into a bar. George Lucas orders a cosmo. Peter Jackson orders a fine Sauvignon Blanc. James Cameron orders them both to shut up."
"Clark Kent: How's your lunch? Bruce Wayne: This soup is great. CK: don't BW: You could even say CK: please don't BW: It's Souper, man"
"What is the difference between catholic priest and acne? An acne doesn't come on boy's face until he's 13."
"Knock Knock * Knock Knock * Who's there? * I say to mart * I say to mart who? * I say tomato, let's call the whole thing off"
"Where do you hide after a murder? Behind a badge."
"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Doesn't matter how many there are, they can't change anything."
"I was eating at a nice dinner last night and realized that we spend a lot of money on something that is just going to turn to shit. But enough about my romantic relationships."
"I hope my childhood BFF forgot that silly pact we made at five to kill each other if we hadn't become ponies by 2015. She was really dark."