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Joke of the Day

"During the stone age, long before Facebook, man was already experiencing the desire to express on a wall what he had eaten."

"[first date] girl: I bet you're really cute under those glasses [removes frames/is instantly obliterated by Cyclops' optic blast]"

"I'd Like to Make A Pun About Weed, But... I don't want to be blunt about it"

"What drug is most destructive with phones? Crack."

"Why can't Miss Piggy count to 70? Every time she gets to 69, she has a frog in her throat."

"Charlie Sheen lied.. He told us he had tiger blood. It seems as though he had Magic's blood."

"I used to be addicted to the Hokey Pokey but I turned myself around."

"Love is not a game. If you think it is, then you're not playing it right."

"If an Elvis impersonator dies, doesn't he kind of become the best Elvis impersonator"

"What do you do with spoiled fish food? Load it in the chum dumpster."