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Joke of the Day

"A giraffe walks into a bar, he sits and orders 6 martinis........ Shame on you for wanting a punchline. This giraffe needs help."

"Why do you want to be buried at sea? Because my wife says she wants to dance on my grave."

"I think Mondays were invented to punish us for all the fun we have on the weekends!"

"Halitosis... is better than no breath."

"I've just read a book on how dramatically footballers wives lose their looks once their husbands retire.It's a real WAGS to witches story."

"Fur Coats will make you into a Man They really put hair on your chest."

"Why do Jews have big noses? Because air is free."

"t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t t i t ~ just dotting some i's and crossing some t's."

"Mom: Why can't you be successful like your brother? Amazon: heh Optimus: But I saved humanity from Decepticons! Thanksgiving at the Primes"

"What's the difference between a Lima Bean and a Chick Pea? I never payed a hundred bucks to have a Lima Bean on my face."