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Joke of the Day

"How do you make an orange turn red? Get John Boehner to cry."

"For what I lack in imagination, I more than make up for in something else."

"Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses."

"Whores on first, sluts on second, idle hos on third."

"Time Machine I bought a second hand time machine next Tuesday. They don't make them like they're going to anymore."

"What's a baker's favorite part of Manhattan? The Lower Yeast Side."

"[Offensive] Adolf visits the concentration camp and asks a young boy how old he is ""I'll be 6 soon!"" ""Nope"""

"Why did the termite eat a sofa and two chairs? It had a suite tooth."

"I fell into a sewer the other day. It was really shit and draining to get out of."

"What's the difference between a Unicorn and a cop who treats black people fairly? Nothing; they both don't exist."