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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when you lobotomize a bunch of terrorists? Simplifiying Radicals. (MATH joke)"

"Steven Hawking nearly died last year. Luckily they sorted him out, they just switched him off and back on again."

"My two year old nephew, though adorable, is a pretty violent drunk."

"Why can't you trust atoms? Because they make everything up."

"Alsation: How come you are always so well behaved when you go on a walk with your master? Chihuahua: It's the leash I can do!"

"I heard there was a fight at the fish and chip shop. Two cods got battered."

"I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months I don't like to interrupt her."

"Too many people are obsessing over Frozen. They need to let it go"

"CHEAP and EASY Hack for Getting in Touch With Your Inner Self: Use 1 ply toilet paper"

"I have a life outside of internet, it involves charging my phone."