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Joke of the Day
"I like my meth labs like I like my girlfriends: highly unstable and locked in my basement."
Next Joke
"What do you call a Reddit Psychic? A 4chan teller"
"An Irishman walked out of a bar"
"What if I never *dramatic pause* sleep *dramatic pause* a- *falls asleep during third dramatic pause*"
"What does Hillary Clinton's presidency and Bill Clinton's presidency have in common? They were both ruined by weiners."
"When hoes say, new year new me... they really mean new guys, new dick."
"Which country has many spaces to put your car in? Park-istan!"
"If six children and two dogs were under an umbrella how come none of them got wet? Because it wasn't raining."
"I'd estimate about 28% of the drugs you've taken were smuggled here in someone's asshole."
"A one-liner based on what happened to me at work. An insect landed in my beverage, now I'm feeling a bit fly-tea."