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Joke of the Day
"What's white and smells like black paint? White paint"
Next Joke
"No matter how tough you think you are, there's always a closed pistachio ready to mess you up."
"How can I know hundreds of digits of pi But not know the digits of your phone number?"
"I think Hillary Clinton will be the best president. If she couldn't screw Bill, how can she screw America?"
"Why couldn't the headless horseman win the race? He couldn't get a head."
"Now I know it's the 100 Aniversary of the Titanic and all... But aren't the Italians going a little far with their tribute"
"Whats Big, Black, Hard and full of semen? A submarine"
"Strangely enough, yelling ""I have a masters degree!"" at this electric wine opener is not helping me figure out how to make it work. Weird."
"When improv teams ask for suggestions, I like to yell ""Learn a trade before your father cuts you off financially!"""
"Christian pop music? You mean holy shit?"