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Joke of the Day

"My wife says I've placed unreasonable expectations on our kids, but I think Superman and Wolverine will turn out just fine."

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"Why can't Kylo Ren get a date? Because he has always Ben Solo."
"Lauren on Facebook asks: ""What's the best way to ward off ghosts?"" To which I replied: ""a camera."""
"What did the Ukrainian Scientist receive after discovering the dangers of radiation? A Chernobel Prize."
"What did the Jamaican man say when asked why he didn't mind going to jail for stealing the Pikachu card? I love the pokey, mon."
"""Give it to me,""She begged. ""I'm so wet! Give it to me now!"" She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella."
"Cheating in a joke. A man cheats on his girlfriend Lorraine with a woman named Clearly. Lorraine dies suddenly. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, ""I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."""
"Take your husband's last name. Take his first name. Take his social. Assume his identity. Hide the body in a closet. You're the husband now."
"What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps could finish a race"
"Before I proposed to my GF I asked her father but he was already married."