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Joke of the Day

"""Give it to me,""She begged. ""I'm so wet! Give it to me now!"" She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella."

"Why are they called jokes? Because calling them republican presidential candidates would make me cry."

"The Human Centipede review I found it a little tongue-in-cheek... Source: Dad"

"Why did Moses vote for Al Gore? Because the last time he took political orders from a Bush, his country went mucking around in the Middle East for forty years."

"Local Drowning A hippie drowned at the local beach last night. When asked why the free spirit was unable to be save before his tragic death, a lifeguard commented ""He was too far out, man."""

"I'm trying to remember what that soup is called, the kind with chicken and rice.... Oh yeah! Chinken Noodle!"

"And the lord said unto John ""Come forth and receive eternal life"" But John came fifth and received a toaster."

"Dustin Diamond aka 'Screech' arrested for bar stabbing... Will he be, '""Saved by the Bail""?"

"Why didn't the Cancer Cowboy head out West? He was afraid of Chemo-sabe."

"This is one of those gems thought up at 4 am, why does nobody listen to Neo-Nazis? It's all just white noise."