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Joke of the Day

"Saw a Steve Jobs doppelganger on a Spirit airlines flight today You could say that he was there, in Spirit."

"So I got a vasectomy today... Doctor walks in and says: ""you're in good hands, I've altered more balls than Tom Brady"""

"What kind of newspaper do cows read? The Moo York Times"

"I asked my friend if he ever went skiing. . . ""Not in real life, only in Florida."" "

"Apple just announced new plans for the iPhone 8... It wont be a physical device, it will be iMaginary!"

"I love sex. O wait, guess it's not a joke."

"Welcome to Twitter - if you are not already following a mom who drinks wine one will be assigned to you."

"My SO started smoking last night So I slowed down and applied some lube."

"What did the left pussy lip say to the right pussy lip? Girl, we used to be so tight until we let some dick come between us."

"What's the hardest part about nailing a baby to a tree? My penis."