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Joke of the Day

"Saw a Steve Jobs doppelganger on a Spirit airlines flight today You could say that he was there, in Spirit."

"What's the difference between a prostitute with dysentery and an epileptic oyster shucker? The epileptic oyster shucker shucks between fits."

"Dear Algebra, Stop asking us to find your X. She's isn't coming back and don't ask Y."

"Just saw a woman with a Banksy tattoo. She must be a really deep sleeper!"

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish... and he'll be fined for fishing without a license."

"Use this to start a conversation with a stranger. ""On a hot day nothing feels more relaxing then butt chugging a slushy. Say, do you have a funnel?"""

"Whenever I experience happiness, I signal this to other humans by showing the sharpest part of my skeleton."

"I resolve that in 2010 I will kick my procrastination habit in 2011."

"they say a camera adds 5 pounds. that being the case, do african children even exist?"

"I still say a wasp's nest chucked through the window would be the ideal way to end any hostage situation. Nobody's hanging around in there."