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Joke of the Day

"For me, racism is the same as masturbating. I don't approve of it, but I'm pretty damn good at it. (Credits to Ronald Goedemondt)"

"I don't know why beer companies bother with an expiration date... it's never going to make it anywhere near that."

"I have sixth sense, I see stupid people."

"If I had any self control I'd probably eat that too."

"What's the difference between herpes and friends? I don't have any friends."

"Give a man a fish, sickening him with botulism which spreads rapidly, people begin dying in droves, STACKS OF CORPSES BLOT OUT THE SUN."

"A man has been shot with a starting pistol... The police are pretty sure it's race related."

"Did you hear about the actress who stabbed her husband at dinner? That blonde girl Reese.... Not Witherspoon, with her knife."

"Why should you always take at least two Baptists fishing? Because if you take one, he'll drink all your beer"

"Does ""You'll find love when you're not looking for it"" apply to money too? Because let me be clear I am NOT looking for $10 million dollars."