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Joke of the Day
"A man has been shot with a starting pistol... The police are pretty sure it's race related."
Next Joke
"Q: What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone? A: A Rolling Stone says ""hey you get off of my cloud!"" while a Scotsman says ""Hey McLeod get off of my ewe!"""
"I'm never more nervous than when I tell a doctor what I actually eat."
"I like to ask the waiter, ""What do you recommend?"" then stare at him angrily while I order something completely different."
"If Donald Trump builds a 40 foot wall... The only thing he'll do is create a market for 41 foot ladders."
"Kids asked if they could do something & I said yes so my wife lowered my security clearance & now I'm not authorized to make those decisions"
"I asked my Welsh friend... How many shags have you had? He started counting then fell asleep."
"What causes German Earthquakes? Teutonic Plates. I'm sorry I'll find my own way out"
"What's the difference in roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef."
"Jared Fogle gets sentenced 15 1/2 years in prison At least he'll still be able to enjoy footlongs"