224004

Joke of the Day

"A poster with a mugshot saying ""Have you seen this man"" So I rang up and said No. You have to do your bit for society ."

"***Abortion jokes are NOT FUNNY*** Cut it out!"

"Guy shoves plastic farm animals up his butt Doc says his condition is stable."

"What is the most frequent word in the comment section? This."

"Sorry Siri, talking to machines is not for me. I still get tongue-tied at the drive-through."

"Scooters are for men who want to ride motorcycles, but prefer to feel the wind on their vaginas."

"*mugger snatching Elsa's purse Elsa: LET IT GO! Mugger: LET IT GO! Elsa: CANT HOLD IT BACK ANYMORE! Mugger: LET IT GO! Elsa: LET IT GO!"

"Did you hear about the cow who couldn't give milk? She was an udder disappointment."

"In 2016 Scott Baio has called Hillary Clinton a cunt, Chris Christie has called her a criminal and Ben Carson has called her a Lucifer worshiper. What will they call her in 2017? Madam President."

"So I was in Jerusalem and a man was trying to sell me a gold watch... I kept telling him I don't want it. It looks too fake, not real gold. He looked at me and says ""It's not fake, Israel."""