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Joke of the Day

"So this is weird: I bent over to pick up a cashew & a bunch of hot, scented air rushed out of my bottome-hole, making a curious noise."

"Anyone have any sex laying around they're not using I could borrow?"

"What idiot called it blood spatter instead of axe body spray"

"What did the Hot Dog say to the Cucumber? My brothers may have been eaten to death, but hey it was over quicker than your midnight insertion ""fun""."

"Carl: Gonna be a hot one today. Me: Tell me something I don't know. Carl: Male ostriches can roar like lions. Me: Fair enough, Carl."

"A Canadian man has found a dead mouse in his McDonalds coffee. They just don't seem to put the effort into those happy meal toys anymore."

"Have you heard my pizza joke? Never mind, it's too cheesy"

"Why don't anarchists accept the metric system? They refuse to have liters."

"What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? A boy scout comes home from camp."

"What did one Christmas ornament say to the other Christmas ornament? Let's hang."