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Joke of the Day

"I locked my keys in my car outside an abortion clinic They get really angry if you go in and ask for a coat hanger"

Next Joke
 
"What do you call a teenage cheese cracker? Chee-zits I made this up. *bows* Thank you, thank you...thank you so much."
"A woman is looking in the mirror... She complains to her husband:""I'M OLD AND FAT!"" To which her husband replies: ""Your eyesight is still ok."""
"[being pushed into the middle of a dance circle] please, I have a family"
"If a cowboy rides into town on Friday and three days later leaves on Friday how does he do it? The horse's name is Friday!"
"Why was the cake afraid of mobsters? He knew they were going to ice him."
"T he bes thin gabou tTCPfl owcontr oljokesi sthatthey knowwhento backo ff...."
"All my punishment tactics against my 8 year old were in vain until I threatened to transfer her most valued Pokemon to the Professor"
"Why ninja's are a pornographers nightmare You never see them coming!"
"I just wished a Bride-to-be good luck on her first marriage. She didn't seem to appreciate my sincerity."