221030

Joke of the Day

"My dad told what the capital of Greece actually is. It's Fathens."

"As 1000 year old necromancers, my wife and I have debated a lot. Like with the war in the middle east, she thinks it's justified, but then I bring up the dead."

"I just watched a knot making documentary, it was really good! Especially that ending, what a twist."

"Someone asked me if I like fish balls. I don't know, I've never attended one."

"I can sympathize with batteries. I never get included in anything either."

"""Good evening, I will be your waiter for tonight. What would you like to Instagram?"" - how waiters should greet people"

"I once dated a mortician... it didn't work out because I'm not that much of a mourning person. Though she was a real head-turner."

"Behind closed doors, Rachael Ray prefers the sluttier olive oils."

"Good for you when one door closes & another door opens. For the rest of us that usually means we're in jail."

"Have you ever been on the Nile River? I heard it does on for miles and niles and niles... If you don't believe me, you may be in denial."