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Joke of the Day
"My mate Sid had his ID stolen. ""So now i just call him S"""
Next Joke
"What is the difference between a baby and a mars bar? About 500 calories."
"ME: Good date? FRIEND: Ok. Until he got undressed ME: Then what? FRIEND: [sticks out pinky finger] ME: Ah. Then he drank tea in a fancy way"
"What do confused owls say? Too-whit-to-why?"
"Please, keep trying unsuccessfully to suck the snot back up in your nose instead of using a tissue. Everyone loves the noise you're making."
"Received a call from a recruitment consultant. She said to me: ""Sir I have two openings for you...!"" I replied : Yes. I know .There was a long silence and then she hung up."
"Why wasn't the Canadian scared at the movie theater? He knew Nunavut was real."
"George Zimmerman knock knock joke Person 1:Knock knock. Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: George Zimmerman. Person 2: George Zimmerman who? Person 1: Ok good you're automatically on that jury."
"What do you get if you cross a giraffe with a dog ? An animal that barks at low flying aircraft !"
"What did Donald Trump say to Obama at the White House? You're fired!"