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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a baby and a mars bar? About 500 calories."

"Why Couldn't The Melon Get Married Because it can't-elope!"

"Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 shot up a school"

"At jury duty they said, ""You do not have to be fluent in English."" So what you're supposed to do is just guess if the guy is innocent."

"Why does the noble gas always cry? Because all his friends Argon."

"How do you blow up a Muslim's iPhone? Put it into airplane mode."

"Make it hurt nsfw A woman told me to give her 12 inches and make it hurt so I fucked her twice and punched her in the face."

"My friends started to call me Carlos... because I lost my car."

"How do you know Adam and Eve weren't Chinese? They would have eaten the snake"

"If I ever had a one night stand and the guy texted me the next day and said ""nice to meat you""... I'd marry him."