220222

Joke of the Day

"Two muffins are in the oven . . . One turns to the other and says ""It's hot in here"" the other looks at him and screams ""Fuck me! A talking muffin!"""

"My wife is not happy with some of the comments in the anonymous suggestion box I attached our bed."

"Snow White actually hallucinated the Seven Dwarves the whole time. She was a high hoe."

"I came here to tell a Mexican joke But that could be crossing a line."

"Most people need a reason to drink, I need a reason not to drink."

"'90s movie spoiler alert: it's Kevin Spacey."

"In the movie 'The Hunt for Red October' ... the entire story is the sub-plot."

"The woman who first decided that tights are pants should get the Nobel Peace Prize."

"You hear about these Islamic balloons? ... they blow themselves up."

"When is a door, not a door? ... when it's ajar."