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Joke of the Day

"Me: ""I'm looking for a psychic who rates themselves highly."" Ian: ""I'm a medium."" Me: ""I need someone better than that."""

"Seriously mam there's a fine line between tan and looking liked you rolled around in Doritos"

"Whoever invented popcorn deserves the Medal of Honor for not panicking after the first 45 seconds."

"why can't conservatives work at a checkout counter? Because they don't like change..."

"Q. How do men define a ""50/50"" relationship? A. We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle."

"How do you start a rave in Africa? Glue toast to the ceiling."

"The only thing worse than having a small penis... Is having small arms."

"Ain't no party like a dyslexic party Cause a dyslexic party don't pots."

"You've cat to be kitten me right meow."

"If I could meet any celebrity it might have to be David Schwimmer. In a schwimming pool. Learning how to schwim."