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Joke of the Day
"Seriously mam there's a fine line between tan and looking liked you rolled around in Doritos"
Next Joke
"if a woman tells me she just wants be friends I say ok but I get to be rachel"
"*doctor lifts sheet so wife can identify the body* why is he smiling? ""the last thing he heard was that his blood pressure was 69 over 69"""
"What part of New York has the most feminists? Manhatin'"
"Husband's early morning farts sound like they end with a question mark. The answer is ""No."""
"Q: How do you tell a brown bear from a grizzly bear? A: Climb a tree. If the bear climbs up and eats you, it's a brown bear. If the bear knocks the tree down and eats you, it's a grizzly."
"Edward Snowden just joined Twitter. Almost immediately he got more followers than the NSA. Luckily for the NSA, they follow a lot more people than Snowden."
"What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match."
"A Santa joke. So what does a pimp and Santa have in common? They both go Ho Ho Ho I'll see myself [out] (http://i.imgur.com/9gdyd.gif)"
"If you hold a SUV up to your ear, you can almost hear the sound of the ocean screaming."