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Joke of the Day

"""I know exactly how you feel."" *staring at a deflated giant inflatable snowman"

"I once slowly roasted a Marshmallow over fire until the Michelin Man gave me some free tires."

"I think this joke is clever. What do you think? How do you turn a metal cutting drill bit into a stone masonry drill bit? Sharpen the tip to 32 degrees."

"I just had a moment of clarity. Glad that's over with."

"I took the airline to court over my missing luggage. I lost my case!"

"My boss told me that if I can't show up sober then don't bother coming to work tomorrow. Three day weekend!"

"Hey, hey...calm down please. Stop crying. I think all babies are ugly, not just yours."

"There is a fine line between a numerator and a denominator.* *Only a fraction of you will understand this."

"How do you keep an idiot in suspense? I'll tell you later"

"Self-refilling glass. Just add water"