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Joke of the Day

"Mah Dearest Emma, War on Christmas is hell. This morn, I saw 7 elves stabbed with 1 menorah. I fear this nog soaked yuletide may nevah end."

"How do you get 27 kids to carve a statue? Have everybody chip in."

"Why are some chillies nosy? They're jalapeno business"

"My Estonian girlfriend gave me a BJ the other day When she looked up at me and said ""12 months!"""

"Did you hear about the guy who told everyone goodbye and then didn't leave? It was much adieu about nothing."

"""evreytime god closes a door, he opens a window"" - me, tryimg to convince my clients their house isnt haunted"

"How do you pay for a circumcision? With a tip!"

"My girlfriend is like a goddess... My friends and family don't believe she exists."

"If Ben Franklin was a Nazi, how would he have discovered electricity? By frying kikes."

"Chris Hansen loses his job and has to get a new job as a cashier at Walmart ""Why don't you take a receipt?"""