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Joke of the Day

"What does a red neck divorce and a burning meth lab have in common? Someone's losing a trailer. Edit: Because I fucked up."

"Are you a monosaccharide? 'Cause sugar, you're basic."

"What do you call a Asian walking a dog A vegetarian"

"How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them."

"If Hilary Clinton and Donald trump go on a stranded island together who survives? America."

"What's harder to pull out of than Iraq? Bristol Palin."

"Sometimes I want to kidnap a few woman for two to three weeks so that their eyebrows can grow without fear"

"Honey, can we skip that wedding this weekend? ""What? Why?"" It sounds boring and there's no way that couple makes it.. ""It's OUR wedding!"""

"[parole hearing] OFFICER: are u reformed? ME: I O: go on M: I th O: tell us M: I'm O: yes M: can I finish my sentence O: ok parole denied"

"What do you call a lonely terrorist? ISIL-ated"