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Joke of the Day

"So I have this friend who's addicted to drinking brake fluid... but he tells me not to worry, he can stop anytime he wants."

"What's the worst thing about banging a girl with a cold heart? The rest of her is cold too."

"Man A: Would you suck my cock if I cleaned it? Man B: No.. Man A: You dirty cocksucker!!!"

"I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine, he gets better with age..... The next day, she locked me in the cellar."

"What happens when a lighter smokes weed? It becomes a high-lighter!"

"It's ok to eat meat on Fridays during lent! As long as you burn the hell out of it..."

"""I bought a new car!"" Whoa that's a lemon, how much did you pay? ""Only $3,200"" Dude it's literally a piece of fruit ""Damn....not again"""

"A man walks into a bar and notices two things: 1. there's a line. 2. The daily special is a Cranberry & Vodka. So he gets into the punch-line."

"If you name a baby Barbara, the baby turns 50 years old immediately."

"My husband hits me whenever I tell a joke. He doesn't strike me as the funny type."