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Joke of the Day

"I was disappointed to learn Flickr is not a site about female masturbation."

"It took America two days to create ""anti-WikiLeaks legislation"", yet, proper regulation of the financial sector, for example, is awol."

"My girlfriend pegged me for the first time last night. The sex was great, but I don't know why she insisted on wearing an eye patch."

"If I were a rapper I'd go by the name of lay-Z. Wouldn't release a single track."

"[standing at the hospital nursery window with other new parents] ME: this zoo is terrible"

"Trampolines used to be called jumpolines Until your mother jumped on one back in 87"

"I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday. Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever!"

"My coworkers and I do this fun thing where they say 'It's so cold out!' and I say 'It's winter' and then we silently hate each other."

"What was the statistician's favorite herb? Bayes-il"

"What goes dot-dot-croak dot-dash-croak ? Morse toad !"