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Joke of the Day

"I put the 'extra vag' in extravaganza"

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"Are you a haunted house? Because every time I come inside you I shit myself."
"A guy comes in a bar My bad, it's actually a horse. So a guy comes in a horse..."
"""Bitches always be conforming to unhealthy standards set and perpetuated by the media."" - socially conscious rapper"
"Apparently there are midget prostitutes in Thailand who cost less than a dollar. Clearly they're selling themselves short."
"So I just got a new FitBit. Everytime I take the stairs instead of the elevator, I tell myself ""For the watch!"""
"I have an intense fear of hiccups Luckily, I only ever have one."
"Whats long and black? the unemployment line."
"Playing play doh w/ 3 is just her ordering me to ""make elephant! Now teapot!"" As if I have the artistic ability to create more than a ball."
"The inventor of the USB cable died recently. They're still trying to figure out which way to put his casket in the ground."