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Joke of the Day
"Japan isn't a democracy. They don't have big erections."
Next Joke
"Good news: I finally had sex with my wife last night! Bad news: I spent the entire 60secs wondering how I was going to tweet it to you guy"
"What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs? One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean!"
"Doctor: ""Just lie back and relax, I'll start the lasik eye procedure in a moment."" *Turns on laser* *Patient's face is attacked by cats*"
"It would be way cooler if whenever you punched a kid, a bunch of coins came out of them like in Mario. But ya, I'm free to babysit tonight."
"I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back Apparently, that is an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient."
"What did the band director say to the misbehaving kid? You're in treble mister!"
"Why did the dolphin run away from home to start a new life? He felt he had lost his sense of porpoise."
"Why should Donald Trump change his name to Donald Duck? Because he's a quack."
"What is long and yellow and always points north? A magnetic banana."