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Joke of the Day
"What do you call someone who can't eat burnt toast? Black toast intolerant."
Next Joke
"When I'm mad at my kid, I don't put the straw from the juice box in their school lunch."
"My girlfriend never swears in public... But when we're talking dirty around the house she curses like a sailor, and it really turns me on. I guess it's true, women should be obscene but not heard."
"Subway only exists because we're all too damn lazy to throw a sandwich together. ""Could you lay meat on that bread for me? Here's $8."""
"What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? RAWR!"
"When I send someone email instructions that end with ""Let me know if you have trouble,"" I'm really saying, ""Let me know if you're an idiot."""
"What's the difference between OP and Fed-Ex?"
"Be serious with unknown girls. Boy: The principal is so dumb! Girl: Do you know who I am? Boy: No... Girl: I am the principal's daughter! Boy: Do you know who I am? Girl: No... Boy: Good! *walks away*"
"What do you get with breaking news? News casts."
"I listen to your prayers, but only to correct their grammar."