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Joke of the Day
"I listen to your prayers, but only to correct their grammar."
Next Joke
 
"A great way to relive your childhood is to outgrow your clothes every few months."
"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my dick up your ass"
"Cats always have an expression like they ordered 2 of everything on Amazon with your credit card while you were at work."
"Sometimes I put my cat in the sunroom hoping the coyote who lives out back will charge at it and bounce off the glass."
"I wonder what its like to fart in zero gravity. Does it like...propel you forward? These are things I think people need to know, NASA."
"I met a ninja and asked if he could throw those pointy stars that ninjas have. He said, ""shuriken."""
"LIFE HACK: Sneak into doctor's waiting rooms instead of subscribing to magazines."
"Why did the student go to the strip club on his 18th birthday? He wanted to study a broad"
"The Clock is Ticking... 9:09 9:10 George Bush 9:12 9:13"