214984

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a toilet seat and dinner? Dad doesn't piss all over his dinner. :D"

"Advent calendars are fun if you ignore that every day is a new, fresh hell waiting to be survived."

"Why did Snow White stop using the mail-in photo lab? She was tired of singing ""Some day, my prints will come..."""

"Two Communists are hanging out at a nudist park... One says, ""So, have you read Marx?"" ""Yeah, it's these damn wicker chairs."""

"Convincing my dog I really threw the ball is the closest I'll ever get to being a magician"

"My counsellor told me I have a problem with vengeance. We'll see about that."

"What's the difference between a bitch and a slut? A slut will fuck everybody in the room a bitch will fuck everybody in the room, except for you."

"UK: Hey u ok USA: What UK: I saw what happened USA: Im fine, nothing happened Canada: Hey I know what I said before but you can't stay over"

"I made a butchers club The only problem is we can't agree to a meating time."

"So, I haven't seen the vice president in the news much recently I think that he may just be Biden his time"