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Joke of the Day

"For a long time I thought I was Jewish. But it turned out to be psychosemitic."

"What's a holocaust survivor's favorite movie? Gone With The Wind."

"FULLY LOADED Q: What did the mommy bullet say to the daddy bullet? A: ""We're gonna have a BB!"""

"You can never lose a homing pigeon - if your homing pigeon doesn't come back, what you've lost is a pigeon."

"An Art Thief is Sitting in His Driveway... He didn't have any Monet, to buy Degas, to make his Van Gogh."

"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil and paper"

"[Auto-shop class] ""Cody, for the last time, it's still a carburetor even when it's in a van"" *raises hand* ""Or a truck"" *lowers hand*"

"Why is Mrs. Claus disappointed? because Santa came early! I'll let myself out."

"My girl threw this one at me right before bed: ""Do you know why I don't like going to the dentist?"" Because they always do a full cavity search!"

"Man, you gotta hand it to Dick Cheney. Or else he'll torture you."