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Joke of the Day

"My favorite response to someone asking how something works... ""Magic"" even when I do know how it works. Because Lazy"

"*Dive rolls across the room naked Her- Why don't you just buy curtains?"

"What do you call a snobbish thief walking down the stairs? A condescending con descending."

"My favorite romantic comedy sub-genre is ""Hugh Grant falls in love with someone for no reason."""

"Why did the man fall down the well? He couldn't see that well"

"Mom says to Dad: ""I've found a BDSM magazine under our son's bed. What are we supposed to do about it?"" Dad replies: ""I don't know honey, but I think, hitting him would be very wrong."""

"I saw a chameleon today... So I guess it's safe to say it was a pretty shit chameleon."

"what do my ex and my toilet have in common? They both keep bringing up old shit"

"A priest, a rabbi and an imam walk into a bar... ..and the barman says, ""What is this, some kinda joke?"""

"What's the difference between a cow and the Twin Towers? You can't milk a cow for 15 years."